The Loneliness of a Lighthouse Keeper....

Two's Company: Three's Safer.....

In the early 1980’s whilst on a fishing holiday in County Kerry in the South of Ireland, I stayed a couple of nights with a friend named Ted.    He was a Lighthouse Keeper on one of the lighthouses out in the Atlantic.    He spent three weeks on duty there and three weeks on shore leave at home.    (Most lighthouses are now unmanned and automatic).

During the course of the evening he asked me for any jokes or stories and as I am not shy on the subject I began telling some of my police stories and jokes – bearing in mind that his wife Deidre was also present with the children I only told the clean versions.   Every now and again, Ted would excuse himself and leave the room.

After the fifth or sixth time I asked Deidre if Ted was alright.   She merely said that he was writing down the stories in the kitchen to tell the other keepers the next time he was on duty.    I was amazed and later spoke to Ted about it.   He told me that there were always three men on duty at all times and during the boring times and if radio or television was receiving poor reception, they would tell the stories.   The one with the best new stories was the bees-knees.

It was many years later that I discovered the reason why there were always three keepers on site at all times.   I will call it the Smalls Lighthouse Mystery.

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The current Smalls Lighthouse is situated about twenty miles off the Pembrokeshire coast in Wales.   It was completed in 1861 and had a heliport built on the roof in 1978.   It was permanently manned with a rotating crew of three until it became automated in 1987.   

Much to my surprise I discovered that it is lit by a mere 35 watt bulb which is greatly magnified by its special glass.   It can be seen at night up to 20 miles distance.   Much more surprising is that fact that it was the first lighthouse to have a flushing toilet.

Now ....back to the mystery.   In 1776 on the same remote site the first lighthouse was built.   Unlike the present one which is brick, mortar and stone, it stood on nine large oak pillars.   The plans had been presented to Trinity House (the overseeing body) by Henry Whiteside, a Liverpool musical instrument maker.   The design allowed the strong seas to pass through the oak pillars and worked successfully.   It did develop some rocking and once when Whiteside went by boat to the lighthouse to correct the ‘faults’, he and the keepers were marooned there by monstrous seas.
In fact he wrote notes, put them into bottles, the bottles into small barrels and threw them into the sea.   By some miracle one was found, the authorities informed and he was rescued.

This left two keepers in charge of the lighthouse.   Thomas Howell and Thomas Griffith, the two keepers were known to often quarrel and there was no love lost between them.

One day, Griffith died in a freak accident and Howell fearing that he would most likely be suspected of murdering him if he threw the body into the sea, decided to build a makeshift coffin.   He placed the body of Griffith into it and when it began to decompose, he took it outside and tied it to the structure.   The winter storms that blew smashed the coffin and Griffith’s arm fell out within view of the window of the living quarters.

Whenever the wind blew the arm would swing which made Howell believe that the other was calling to him.

Although he managed to do his duties throughout the following weeks and lit the light every night, he suffered greatly.   When eventually relieved by the incoming crew he was unrecognisable and quite insane.

And so................since that episode there were always three crew members on duty at any one time.........

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